A FEW THINGS Flight Attendant’s WISH you knew..
OKAYYY so here’s the deal, it happens to everyone.. you rush rush rush to the airport, you wait in a million lines with a million people, and this thing called “travel brain” happens. I know you are a good person but for some reason even the best people get a little screwy when they travel.. here’s a few reminders and hot tips that your neighborhood flight attendant wish you knew..
**these are all my views and do not in any way represent the company I work for or anyone else in this profession**
1.)Despite popular belief we are not meteorologist/mechanics. I know CRAZYYYY.
Illustrator Kelly Kincaid @jetlaggedcomics
We literally know as much as you as far as delays go due to weather and mechanical. In fact, we’re more concerned if we’ll be taken off our next trip and paid protected. Because for some reason this is how the airline industry works. You’ll know when you know.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had a delay with passengers who want to ask me a million questions or the same question a million different ways. Honestly you will probably get an email or update faster than I will.. And the main focus is getting there safe and if the weather is shaky or maybe the brakes or whatever needs a replacement, believe you’ll feel better knowing that you will arrive.. At all.
2.)Situational Awareness
This should really be number 1. I got something for ya.. You are NOT THE ONLY ONE on the aircraft. Also this is a pretty blanket statement “situational awareness” that is.. so here are just a few of the many..
Look there can be anywhere from 127-280 sometimes 300 ppl onboard. The simplest things such as giving somebody room to put their bag up or practicing a 5 sec distance when boarding between yourself and the person in front of you.
Put your seat back up if there is a meal time. I know it is rare these days, I happen to work for an airline that still does serve meals, so this highly applies.
This is a personal pet peeve.. Put the toilet seat down. This is not your house.
Also bc I know most of you did not travel in the oh so glamorous days of aviation, the level of service we do provide, does not include putting your bags up. PERIOD.
Kelly Kincaid @jetlaggedcomics
With the numerous amount of baggage fees these days I get it, your carry on has your entire life in it, which can be VERY HEAVY. A rule to live by: If you can’t lift it, then don’t pack it.
Disclaimer: of course I’d help a lil ol lady or man, or anyone needing obvious assistance.. but most of the time the ppl asking are quite capable
3.)The LEVEL of disgust when you DO NOT WEAR YOUR SHOES.. To bathroom or AT ALL is absolutely immeasurable. I am not completely sure when this exactly came to be however, it HAS got to stop.
You are using a public toilet. Basically a port-a-potty with no socks, or worse (if thats even fkng possible) with socks on (bc somewhere in your twisted mind it’s a barrier or something?) and you track honestly, who knows what liquid onto your socks that go back into your shoe that you take off in your home or wherever.. Ughhh just writing this completely grosses me out.
It’s NOT SANITARY. On like ANY LEVEL... Stop and think and act accordingly.
4.) DIETARY NEEDS.
Seriously do I need to elaborate?
If an airline, is considerate enough to provide you with a meal, be considerate enough to yourself to pack your own food if you: have allergies, are a vegan, a vegetarian, lactose intolerant, gluten free, paleo, keto, or anything.. Anything.
5.) Headphones.
There is a couple reasons I am down that aisle, food, drinks, or to da a compliance check( to make sure your seat belt is fastened ) or all of the above. Unless of course you are traveling internationally, in which case pay attention.
Take your headphones off when you see me approach you, or better yet do not ask me, just assume by looking at my cart I am serving a drink.. do not ask what I have if you already know what you want.. its like when someone asks to name all the beer and in the end just orders a Coors Light.. like C’mon I know that’s all you drink anyway so don’t dilly dally around and experiment.. go with what you know.. espesh 35,000 ft up in the air..
alsooo I will assume (which is not always a good idea) that this is not your first cup of coffee.. in other words include how you take it in your order. For example, “I’d like a coffee with cream and 2 sugars” instead of “Coffee Please”.. it literally feels like I coach people thru their coffee orders and that would be fine if you were the only one but I usually am serving 30-50 people at a time, so please, I beg you..
6.) MASKS
After going back to work this was something I had to add to the list - if only to remove soon enough. MASKS. At this point in the pandemic or post pandemic or however you want to categorize this moment we’re in - one thing is FORSURE, you are well aware how to wear one properly. Federally- MASKS ARE STILL REQUIRED onboard an aircraft. To be honest I do not want to be the mask police but damn it if I have to wear it so do you! Much like a store that you can choose not to go to- you can make that same decision to not fly. These are the rules. I think the biggest bummer about this- is the blatant disrespect I have experienced from people. I would simply ask you to imagine your loved one in my position- managing 268 people at any given time, doing his/her best, there for your safety- you know in case you choke, have a seizure, or god forbid have a stroke- and then think of the amount of stress it actually is to argue with grown adults. Please just wear it. And if you have a problem with it- I would suggest taking a road trip.