You are Not for Everyone.. and thats okay
I posted this the other day and a had quite a few shares and repost- over 300 to be exact. I posted it out of my more recent experiences and looking back I’d have to say lots of past experiences also. It seems so simple to say “I don’t care what others think” but as women we do. As humans we do. I mean to an extent right? We seek approval from others in lots of ways- as children we know that a happy response from our parents means we’re doing good, and a bad ones like I often got for my grades resulted in bad responses.
So when does it stop? It seems to only get worse the older we get and the more intense school gets, this group, that group, popular, athlete, and so on. Now with social media - follows, views, likes, comments, saves, and shares literally define what your worth ( monetarily anyway ) as a creator.. sure they say you can technically make money at any following- but yet the number one question is what Follower count are you at?
I started this blog because I love magazines, and I feel like this is my online magazine. I love sharing. I have found I actually love writing, and learning graphic design as well. I would be remise if I didn’t seek some approval from my mom, sister, other family, friends and yes even Si. It never even occurred to me that anyone could not like it. Because honestly how could you not? I mean this is a work of art!
The more I created though, and found my stride here in writing and in my social media, the more I realized that even some of the people I held in highest regard weren’t as hip to me as I had thought. I noticed the support slacking, them talking down about social media, and just not reading my words. In all honesty, I was starting to take it personal. I even confronted a very close friend of mine about it, and she told me she didn’t like ANY OF BOAM.
As Carrie Bradshaw once said to Mr. Big after learning of his engagement
“Well that was like taking a bullet”,
I had to truly do some inner searching, and I have done some research too…
Turns out not everyone loved Van Gogh at first, he only sold one painting when he was alive, its been said some don’t even like the Queen B herself Mrs. Beyoncé Knowles Carter, Queen (the band) got told no-one would ever listen to a six minute song, and the bloggers that started 10 years ago have businesses of their own and growing six figure accounts because they were doing something when no one saw a reason to.
And if you're causing some sort of conversation, then isn’t that the point? To be different? To be maybe unsure about? If you're disrupting the space you're doing it right. And that’s when it kinda clicked. I’m not for everyone, and that's okay. And once we can or do accept this fact we live more freely.
But don’t get it twisted. If you love someone, are friends with someone or even if you don’t consider them a close friend, somethings are really better left unsaid. Thats just being a nice human. Perpetuating your hate or dislike for one persons art form doesn’t make anyone feel good. You can unfollow people in real life and I have really tried to shed that energy around me as well. I let people show me who they are- so I can act and respond appropriately.
In the end if I can bring a smile, provide value, and make you feel seen on any given day, I have done my BOAM duty. Honestly DO YOU- your community will find you, like minded individuals always gravitate to each other. The ones that leave, that’s okay too. Just remember, we all run through seasons with each other.
If I could leave you with one last quote:
“Happy hoes ain’t hatin and hatin hoes ain’t happy”
